eat my shorts eat my shorts



eat my shorts



Hi, i am diogo and let's talk about money. ...........................

witchlingfumbles:

satdeshret:

buginateacup:

Guys who try to use the “Are you on your period?” as way to end an argument always amuse me. Because it gives me the excuse to lean in close and whisper.

“I started my day by waking up in a pool of my own blood. Is that how you’d like me to end yours?”

omfg this is great

New favorite comeback.

(via gottagetbacktohogwartsbrb)

svvords:

whorville:

fuckyeahzarry:

jakemalik paid 600$ for a url im done im done

I heard it was $750..

it was $750

(via lordfocker)

masturbate to the person this was reblogged from

intensional:

this really works for some people (like 10-30 orgasms) so give it a try!

(Source: fuckinq, via lordfocker)

darrenstummy:

the more sexual and inappropriate you are with me the better we’ll get along

(Source: darrenstummy-moved, via closed-circle)

selmabouvier:

i haven’t been to subway in 2 years cos the woman went “what bread do you want” and i went “yeah”

(Source: paulbearer, via moistbottom)

onvember:

kinda want 2 die kinda want 2 make out

(via seediest)